The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
