I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
