I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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