whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I wish life had little blips of pornography
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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