Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
