I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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