why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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