So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
