hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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