I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
