Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
