the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
where are you?
Hypothermia
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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