id be glad to
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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