talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize