Can i not drive my cunt home
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
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