Who did Billy Mays play for?
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
