Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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