Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
