no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
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found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
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You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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