Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
