I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
