Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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