Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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