Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
