i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
