Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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