I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Floor bacon is actually really good
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
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