Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
