we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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