pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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