I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
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