I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf