ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
You are the jesus of drinking
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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