No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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