maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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