Texts From Last Night

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  (631): View more from New York

  Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?

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  (631): Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach? http://tfl.nu/iba6
  Replies (10) Good night (1426) Bad night (568)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.

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  (847): She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses. http://tfl.nu/wrem
  Replies (50) Good night (1318) Bad night (4708)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.

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  (856): smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life. http://tfl.nu/69tk
  Replies (34) Good night (7467) Bad night (866)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..

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  (416): You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill.. http://tfl.nu/sqyp
  Replies (5) Good night (4276) Bad night (855)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.

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  (403): were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found. http://tfl.nu/pucp
  Replies (13) Good night (2360) Bad night (1018)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.

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  (410): Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops. http://tfl.nu/wmir
  Replies (5) Good night (2165) Bad night (918)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing

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  (616): he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing http://tfl.nu/m3tl
  Replies (8) Good night (2261) Bad night (911)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I think there was chlamydia in those woods.

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  (920): I think there was chlamydia in those woods. http://tfl.nu/fxcg
  Replies (5) Good night (709) Bad night (2319)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.

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  (443): She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk. http://tfl.nu/dqlg
  Replies (6) Good night (2797) Bad night (636)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies

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  (636): If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies http://tfl.nu/2ary
  Replies (3) Good night (1048) Bad night (1513)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?

  (1+44): View more from

  It's a podium place so yeah...

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  (+44): Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right? (1+44): It's a podium place so yeah... http://tfl.nu/cezg
  Replies (7) Good night (1361) Bad night (435)
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  (818): View more from California

  I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.

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  (818): I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt. http://tfl.nu/o8z5
  Replies (8) Good night (1085) Bad night (274)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?

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  (612): The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened? http://tfl.nu/olcd
  Replies (1) Good night (392) Bad night (290)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it

  (408): View more from California

  its winning. its definitely happening

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  (408): this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it (408): its winning. its definitely happening http://tfl.nu/yixq
  Replies (1) Good night (580) Bad night (368)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.

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  (419): Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women. http://tfl.nu/y0qe
  Replies (2) Good night (465) Bad night (803)

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