does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Never let your siblings swipe right.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize