FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
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