I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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