I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I've blown a few things in my day
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
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you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
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I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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