Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I just want nice things and good sex
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
