Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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