Buhtt sex?
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Randomize
