I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
