I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Boobs are out for the taking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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