i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
