what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
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