Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
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