i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood and glitter go together right?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Randomize