So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
She bit a glass in half.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
