I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
